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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25632529">Slice and Dice</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/runningfromrealitytoanime/pseuds/runningfromrealitytoanime'>runningfromrealitytoanime</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The domestic life of an onigiri seller and his editor [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Happy Ending, M/M, cooking disasters, when you try to cut food and cut yourself instead</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 10:28:38</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,451</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25632529</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/runningfromrealitytoanime/pseuds/runningfromrealitytoanime</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens when a chef tries to surprise his boyfriend by cooking the best seafood curry in the world?</p><p>Slice his fingers open with a knife while cutting damn potatoes!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Akaashi Keiji/Miya Osamu</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The domestic life of an onigiri seller and his editor [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1799782</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>49</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Slice and Dice</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I was trying to make the exact same thing an hour ago. Was tired after a run and thought heck, let me treat myself and while I was chopping up ingredients, my knife slipped and voila, cut open two of my fingers. I got so pissed at how I managed to screw up and now can't cook for a while without the fear of slicing open my fingers.</p><p>Which was how I got the inspiration for a OsaAka fanfic cuz heck, why not? Typing was a bitch though; two fingers out a commission is a pain in the ass for writing.</p><p>Although if you're not a fan of blood or cutting fingers open, you might feel a bit cringy when reading. You have been warned (it isn't too bad though).</p><p>Enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There was one thing that most chefs feared and even the most experienced isn’t exempt from this threat; the threat of having a knife slice through your fingers.</p><p> </p><p>Miya Osamu has been a chef for nearly 10 years now and yet, of all of the days that things could go horribly wrong in the kitchen, he sliced not one, but two of his fingers wide open while trying to prepare his meal.</p><p> </p><p>It all began with him humming away to some Disney music as he chopped up some vegetables for the main meal of the day, seafood curry. Keiji had a long week in the office and Osamu wanted to whip up a surprise for him in the form of food, knowing full well it would greatly satisfy the manga editor’s soul. After watching a cute anime about babies called Gakuen Babysitters and found himself drooling at the sight of seafood curry, he couldn’t resist making the dish himself, whisking in and out of the house with all the ingredients in tow within the hour.</p><p> </p><p>He was merrily beginning to cut the potatoes, the onions already frying nicely in the pan to fill the room with an enticing aroma when it happened. Osamu had cut hundreds upon thousands of potatoes and yet, before he knew it, one minute he was singing Let it go and the next the knife had let go of the potato, right onto his left hand’s middle and pointer finger, slicing them wide open.</p><p> </p><p>Initially, Osamu stared at his fingers as the wounds opened up, blood seeping through them to paint the steel sink a bright red. It was only when he realised the blood wasn’t stopping did he panic, letting out a yell and dropping the knife just as the door opened to the sound of Keiji calling, “I’m home.. Samu?”</p><p> </p><p>“Hi babe. Welcome home,” Osamu grunted from the kitchen, trying his best to smile through the pain as his boyfriend dropped his bag and entered the space, staring at the sight of blood pooling into the sink. The mess that was tonight’s dinner remained scattered on the countertop, Osamu giving him a sheepish grin as he put his arms wide, “Surprise?”</p><p> </p><p>Keiji didn’t seem to buy it as he walked into the shared bathroom, taking out the first air kit from the cabinet as well as taking out a bottle of murky brown stuff that he had kept there for ages. Osamu had tried to smell it once and man, did it smell nasty. The editor brought over the kit, setting it up on the table as he instructed his lover to wash the wound as he took out a shot glass, filling up the glass with the murky substance as Osamu eyed it in alarm.</p><p> </p><p>“Uh, are you going to make me drink it?” Keiji rolled his eyes as he slid the glass towards Osamu, the chef gagging as Keiji gently took his hand and stuck the injured fingers into the liquid, earning a hiss and a curse from Osamu as he felt a tingling feeling up his fingers.</p><p> </p><p>“What in the…” Osamu yelped as he stared at the glass, his blood slowly mixing into the liquid. The stinging sensation remained for a minute before it turned into a throbbing ache, the chef trying to remove his fingers when he received a harsh tap on the face from his boyfriend.</p><p> </p><p>“Keep your fingers inside. I will prepare dinner while you wait for it to be done.”</p><p> </p><p>“But babe…”</p><p> </p><p>“No buts. I’m not about to have you split open more body parts,” Keiji ordered as Osamu gave a mock salute with his free hand, the editor rolling his eyes as he looked at the mess around him. It wasn’t as though he didn’t know how to cook; why cook when your lover does cooking for a living and is the best onigiri chef in Japan?</p><p> </p><p>“Seafood curry?”</p><p> </p><p>“You guessed it,” Osamu laughed as Keiji picked where he left off. After his little stunt, Osamu’s eyes couldn’t help but linger at Keiji’s fingers as they danced over the ingredients, slicing them up with accurate precision. Maybe it was a setter thing but he rarely ever saw Keiji had any injuries whilst cooking or cutting anything, or maybe the man didn’t tell him anything at all.</p><p> </p><p>Once Keiji had finished slicing up the potatoes, he tossed them in with the onions that Osamu had managed to save by turning off the stove earlier, letting them sizzle in the pan for fifteen minutes before adding in the seafood. The smell of fried fish, squid and prawn filled the air, making Osamu drool as the man stirred away.</p><p> </p><p>“What is this stuff anyways?”</p><p> </p><p>“Granny’s special medicine. She always made it back when I was younger to treat any injuries I had. She called it her miracle herb, able to stop bleeding even if the wound is very deep or bad. I can’t count the number of times she had managed to save me from using a lot of tissue paper just to stop the bleeding as a child.”</p><p> </p><p>“Was Keiji a naughty child?” Osamu purred as Keiji threatened to whack the man with the spatula. Once the ingredients were nicely cooked, he poured in some boiling water before adding in curry cubes, turning the mixture into a nice brown concoction. Just as he finished with the main dish, the sound of the rice cooker going off, signalling the rice being cooked went off in the background as Keiji turned to face him.</p><p> </p><p>“You can take it out now,” Keiji smiled as he ladled out the food for them. Osamu pulled out his fingers, marvelling at how the wound didn’t even have any blood dripping from it anymore, much different from the earlier situation of blood running in rivets down the sink. Keiji took out some bandages and wrapped his fingers up gently, giving them a kiss for good measure before moving to put the food on their dining table.</p><p> </p><p>“Itadakimasu,” they said together as they dug into the food, Osamu having a bit of problems eating it since he could only use one hand. Finally, he resorted to just using a spoon to scoop out the food, sighing in satisfaction as Keiji asked, “Do you like it?”</p><p> </p><p>“Anything you make is amazing, Keiji.”</p><p> </p><p>“I learn from the best.” The two men ate in comfortable silence, once in a while talking about the respective days at work and maybe a bit of gossip from their friends. Keiji wasn’t saying anything about how romantic the table was set up, including some rose petals scattered across the top with some wine glasses. Osamu had even wanted to turn on some nice jazz music in the background until the incident and he thought he might die earlier than his stupid twin.</p><p> </p><p>“So, how did the best chef in Japan slice his fingers and stare at it like an alien came out of them?”</p><p> </p><p>“Keiji! I was just shocked. I haven’t been cut ever since culinary school and even then I didn’t have blood pooling into the damn sink!” he wailed as Keiji laughed, moving to fill the glasses with wine. Osamu knew full well that they didn’t exactly compliment curry but to hell with that; he still has his fingers courtesy of Keiji and he was going to have fun that night!</p><p> </p><p>“I know we had a crazy day with me nearly losing my fingers and dying…”</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t be so dramatic,” Keiji grinned as Osamu continued on, “but I just wanted to say you how much I love you. Now with your voodoo medicine, I can stay alive even longer and I plan to keep you by my side for that as long as I can.” The man shuffled out of his seat, trying his best to reach into his pocket with his bad hand to pull out a small box. He got down on one knee, his cut fingers fumbling to open the box until he finally pried it open to reveal a small ring seated inside a velvet seat.</p><p> </p><p>“Akaashi Keiji, become Miya Keiji. Marry me and I swear I will let you eat curry every day and become a happy man.” Keiji covered his mouth as his eyes watered, his head nodding as Osamu reached to slip the ring onto his finger. For some stupid reason, he used his left hand and ended up missing it several times before Keiji had to guide him to the finger, giggling as he pushed the band on.</p><p> </p><p>“You’re such a cute fox, Osamu.”</p><p> </p><p>“Love you too, Keiji.”</p><p> </p><p>Cut fingers be damned, Osamu snagged a fiancé that night and that was all that mattered.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>My actual grandma actually has this sort of medicine where if you dip the injured area into it, the bleeding will stop. Dunno what she puts in there but hey, it works so why not.</p><p>All comments and kudos are welcomed! They really make my day!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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